From Chaos to Clarity

Trying times, times of utter despondency, are as essential, if not more, than the moments of profound happiness in life. It may seem counterintuitive, but more often than not, a difficult time brings our inner voice to the surface, where we can hear it. If we follow this voice, we may begin to walk towards finding out the truth about life. Imagine standing still in the middle of a busy street during the busiest shopping time of the year. You can hear people talking, babies crying, cars swooshing past you, music playing on loudspeakers, and then imagine all that noise slowly fading into the background... till you hear nothing but your heart beating. That's the kind of clarity that can be brought about by profound grief.

I wonder about these trying times and what they signify in our life...be it something bad that has happened to us, or something bad that we did. These dark places must exist for a reason. Sometimes these difficult patches are mere bumps in the way, and sometimes they seem like long tunnels where darkness is endless and no light to guide us on. During these dark phases, we often question life. Sadly, what it takes to stop and take an inventory of our lives is these difficult times. We have a much deeper conversation with God about life during trying times than during happier times. When things go our way, we usually thank God and move on. We hardly ever sit down and question - Why are you being so nice to me, God? Why me? And what have I done to deserve this happiness? We are thankful without reservations, sometimes even feel entitled, and don't question anything. Only when we go through difficult times do we question - why me, God? what have I done wrong? Why are you punishing me? What are you punishing me for? What will it take to make this all better? And we pray that he shows us a way out of the mess.

I wonder why difficulties make our relationship with God more vocal, bring his voice to the forefront, and sometimes give us profound insights into the reality of the world. Asking questions during these bad times is essential because they bring answers along with them. They make us think about life in general, sometimes show us hidden answers, or they make us look for places or people who can provide these answers. I like to think that grief and trying times are reserved for special people in this world, for people important to Him, because He wants to open up a channel to converse with us. Otherwise, we are so engrossed in the chaos of life that we never stop to hear His voice. Only during difficult times do we block out the outer noise and start diving towards our inner voice, the voice of God.

I won't say be thankful for difficult times in your life because it's not easy to do, but at least try to strike up a conversation with the higher power. It may lead us from chaos to clarity, show us the truth of our existence, and provide us with something to hang on to when everything else seems to slip away.